Chasing Research Dreams - An embarkation for satisfaction

*Note: This is just my feeling and whatever I have seen so far and basically it may be only relatable to some of you.

"Our path is unique and we are one of a kind, remember this always"

    "Chase your dream kids" is a key phrase that we have heard from our childhood onwards, particularly used to motivate young minds. Is it easier said than done, it is not? Once you begin chasing your dreams the journey lying ahead will send us on a variety of emotional loops and I bet our ride ahead is destined to be bumpy. Though this piece of information sits quite well for everyone, the guys/gals whoever dreams to be a researcher will understand the very essence of this feeling. As a researcher, our efforts are often undermined and the returns for our spent time is also unrecognised many times. Like a struggling/newbie actor, a researcher in his/her initial phase of time struggles to settle down as a subject matter expert because learning is a never-ending process. In fact, we never settle down (not talking about clearing exams and getting a govt job) and we continue to grow with every advancement in science. To achieve this feat we need plenty of productive time and unfortunately, the Indian culture that we all were brought up in doesn't exactly allow you to do things as straight as one might think. We are under constant pressure to settle down at the earliest which is nearly impossible for PhD scholars whose life probably starts blooming at the age of 30 (In my opinion), whereas for others their life may start blooming in their early 20s (IT guys... Lolzzzz).  

Why our road to success is foggy???

    Have you ever wondered about this question!! I have asked myself repeatedly and the road in front of us being foggy may be the normal thing for us (That's what I came up with), so I made harmony with a golden term "uncertainty". Yes, because we exactly don't know where we will end up after doing a PhD. In almost every household that I came across, it's a sin to say as a student that "I don't know how I will settle down but I would one day definitely settle down". This statement is frequently used by me, others might be using different versions of this. However, what these statements reveal is a tinge of uncertainty hovering around our life.

    You might say what is the difference no one knows how their lives would end up. Fair enough. Let us consider a UPSC aspirant, he/she will be completing his/her UG and some completing PG joins a coaching centre for their studies. Even if the society asks, we could say I am going to a coaching class and I would clear the government exam. In this scenario, the society does not exclaim as it is a much more secure way of going about one's life. It is a whole different pressure game if one is not able to clear any exams for more than two years (Its all fate 😑😕). As a researcher, we will be more enthusiastic to explore new horizons, so most of us will be keener on doing research rather than settling down behind a desk which is very unacceptable in our society. Maybe this is due to the extra sense of security towards their kids but this hampers their growth. 

    Many have asked me this very question about the future and I would like to list out some of my answers hereunder;

• I would be doing PDF after my PhD
• I would like to work as a research assistant for a year or two to gain experience
• I would like to propose my own project and set up my own lab

Hilarious reactions for these answers;

• What you will keep on studying without going to any job
• Oh RA/SRF/PDF, is it a permanent job.
• If everything you do is temporary, who will marry you? Your life is doomed. 
• You are dying alone man (One of my junior bro told me this...)

All the hells break out, when?

• Mom/Dad, I am taking one year break from my studies so that I can give myself more time to decide about my future course. This one point is enough to make the life a living hell. I have seen many times, that we might be allowed to study up to PhD without much fuzz if we do not take any break-in between.
• Fortunately, my parents were supportive as I could make them understand what I am trying to do with my life and for your information, I took a break for two years from my studies. The break continues and I am stepping into my 3rd year due to covid19. (We can discuss, how to utilize the break and work for achieving an extraordinary future in another blog).
• The second intimidating thing you telling your parents would be the one regarding your marriage. Hopefully, we can all imagine everything revolving around this factor, so am not going to elaborate on this regard.

Why doing this if it is so difficult??

    The one and only apt answer for this would be that we are doing this because we find satisfaction or happiness doing this. Ultimately, we find doing routine work time and again SOOOOOOO boring. We thrive on challenges and we like to keep our brain working in a quest to find something. Also, we don't want to waste our lives without making any sort of impact.  

How to still chase our dream?? 

    As we are choosing a unique path, we need all the essential ingredients such as confidence, dedication, motivation, hard work etc etc.... I would like to point out factors that are solely based on my life experience;

• Pre-planning - Everyone will have different family situations, so plan accordingly and time will definitely be a crucial factor. In my case, I was able to take a break and go about my job. 
• Friends/Peers/Family - These are your pillars and your motivation. Whenever I felt like a complete failure, my friends and family were there to motivate me. So, keep in touch with all those who understand your situation. Especially, my friends who were all trying to achieve something in agricultural research were a great boost to me. Their words were like gold to me. 
• Persistence - In the field of research, there is an infinite number of reasons that would peg you back but we need to find even the smallest reasons and concentrate on it, so that we can persist with our subject interest. 
• Enjoy even a "who cares" moment - I don't know how this could work others but it definitely worked for me. This factor is somewhat related to the above mentioned. So, there are at times it seems like nothing is happening. Such a feeling is very regressive for our progress. I decided to counter this feeling by concentrating on small success or progress that I made on a particular day and started feeling proud of myself (Don't kill me for that 😂). That small progress could be anything, even a new word you learned could do the trick. 

What inspired me to write this down???

    In recent times, it has been very challenging for each and every one of them due to the pandemic. Even with all your persistent hard work, some might not be still able to achieve their dream. I feel lucky to be a part of a peer group who never doubted me and have been a part of my inconsistent journey. Also, I have been a part of theirs too. I am particularly speaking about my friends. The lockdown and the pandemic shook our lives never before (Our detailed story could be shared some other time 😅). Keeping ourselves motivated has been really challenging, whatever the ups and downs, we still believe that we are destined to do something (not at all thinking about age 😂). This emotional rollercoaster is one of the reasons to pen this article. Another reason would be the gender bias in our society. As a boy, I am still able to do as per my wish and even a smallest of thought to give up my passion hurts a lot. I have seen many of my colleagues and juniors of the opposite gender who were so much passionate about research and many even inspired me to do a lot of things have given up on their dreams due to their family circumstances. Many situations could be avoided for girls, if many taboos regarding marriage, childbirth etc were not present in our society. Why I am critical about this factor is that no one can fully overcome the failure of chasing dreams and we only got one life. Gender is not at all a factor for achievements.  

"Let fly and let others fly, dont be a dumbhead to restrict others or clip their wings"